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Vibrating Gadgets, Pronged Gloves and Egg on my Head
…and who said wedding planning was not fun? I’ve had a love-hate relationship with my hair my entire life: it’s frizzy and unruly, and though a straightening iron may mask my secret Cyndi Lauper-esque identity, it sadly also contributes to fragile, breakable ends—making the dream of long, romantic waves for the wedding seemingly unattainable. Thanks to all your suggestions (thank you!), I’ve decided on a down-do. I feel far more comfortable with my hair down, plus it’ll cover my tattoos! But the clock is ticking—I have a matter of months in which to get my hair strong enough to keep growing past my shoulders, and stop breaking off in pieces all over the bathroom sink.
I’ve read up on my options, and after being told extensions may cost between $500 and $1,000 (!), decided the only way to do this is to try everything.
Strategy 1: Get regular trims. I’m one of those people who finds it tough believing making it shorter more often will make it longer in the end, and after being mortified with a “trim” that was far too short last fall, decided against it. This may work in the long run, but we have a deadline! I’ve opted instead for trying to make it more resilient. No matter how messy things may get…
Strategy 2: Products, supplements, and switching up the routine. I recently discovered a new addition to the Pantene line, and Beautiful Lengths sounded like just the ticket. I made the switch a few weeks ago, and also invested in a heat protection spray to use before straightening—hopefully this will help reduce the damage. I’m also going to colour less often, and shampoo at night, so I can cut out the blow-dryer. The lovely Stephanie Gray also told me she heard Gwyneth Paltrow swears by pre-natal vitamins and they’re the key to keeping her heavily coloured and styled hair growing long, healthy and strong!
Strategy 3: Focus on the roots, not just the ends. One thing I’ve read frequently is that stimulating the scalp promotes faster hair growth. I decided to hit up my best friend in wedding planning: eBay. I was looking for a scalp massager, and ended up not only with rubber-pronged shower gloves (you really can find anything on the internet), but also the hilariously named Orgasmatron: no, not a bedroom toy, but a four-speed, Octopus-shaped head massager, which apparently increases circulation—and promotes hair growth.
Strategy 4: Go grocery shopping. And then dump it all over my head. Everyone’s heard stories of home-made hair concoctions, and when I spotted a magazine at the checkout telling me I could “Get Rapunzel-worthy Locks, Fast!” I had to pick it up. I read through pages of tips on better product selection—as well as mixtures I could throw together at home to get stronger, healthier hair. Eggs? Check. Olive oil? Check. Honey? Check… what did I have to lose? I whipped up a rather unappetizing looking mixture, glanced at the model in the magazine, crossed my fingers… and proceeded to pour it all over my head. My first mistake was failing to realize that eggs are kept in the fridge for a reason—this was one COLD mixture! After attempting to warm it in the microwave for slightly too long (and ending up with breakfast), I attempted another batch and tried again. This was messy business—chunks of yolk in my hair, oil dripping down my neck, and nasty remnants in the sink. (Do I still have readers? High five!). Twenty minutes later, I cleaned myself (and the bathroom) up, and left my hair to air-dry—and as hilarious as the experiment was, I must say my hair was significantly less frizzy. I don’t know if I have the stomach to keep this up every week, but maybe it’s worth trying monthly. Maybe?
Have you ever tried anything crazy in planning for your wedding? And do you have any other (slightly less crazy) tips on how to get long, wedding-worthy hair? Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. By me—and my kitchen counters.
Tags: beauty, blogger bride, carrie underwood, diy, hair, textiles, traditional
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[...] as most of you know, I’ve been writing every other week about Dalek cake toppers, pouring raw eggs all over my head, how my bridal party abandoned ship, dressing up as Sleeping Beauty, and counting our blessings. [...]
Just catching up on your posts. Have to say this is my fav of the whole competition. You deserve a prize for covering yourself in egg for the internet! Hope you win!
[...] of the cold (yet having a wedding in the dead of winter), I’m a DIY enthusiast, willing to dump eggs all over my head, dress up as a medieval princess, an eternal optimist, proudly English, poor, and maybe slightly [...]
I am so late on commenting on this post but, Emily! Go to Lola’s Beauty Gallery on Portage Ave (it’s pretty close to the U of W). Thats where I buy my extensions and I have never paid more then $150 :)
Emily I truly think your hair will look beautiful for the wedding without any of the fuss. But good luck in achieving your wedding perfect hairstyle. I don’t have any hair tips for you, but my tip is “don’t sweat the small stuff,” you will be a gorgeous bride regardless of your hairdo! I enjoyed your article. Love Sandy
Haha, oatmeal chunks may be even worse than the egg!! Thanks everyone for the suggestions and sweet comments :) I might try avocado and mayo next, and yes, I would lose far less street cred with a bandana instead of cling film, lol!! :)
Hey Emily!
This blog reminds me of this time when my best friend and I (back in grade 10 I think) decided to try all these natural concoctions for our hair/skin-it was hilarious! We ended up slimy and sticky and there were chunks of oatmeal clumps that looked at poo all over the back yard! haha good times. I think scalp massage would definitely work since it increases blood flow. Also, along the same lines-brushing your hair lots. Anyway, love this post!
Oooo, I’ll have to try that scalp massager thing! I’ve been trying to grow my hair longer and I feel like I can never do that when I get a trim. I haven’t got my hair cut for 4 months now…. :-X but my hair is finally longer lol
Well, I always thought your hair has been one of your nicest physical attributes, so I can definitely see the desire to grow it being nothing but a good thing.
That Orgasmatron thing is apparently really good and very relaxing. You can buy them really cheap over here from I Want One Of Those lol.
I hope your quest for longer, healthy hair is fruitful, after all, you’re worth it. (Sorry, i couldn’t resist.)
whip up a honey mask, forgoe the egg portion, throw on a bandana and go about your business! I’ve also heard a combination mayo mask works..or try a thick, leave in conditioner with avacado. Burts bees puts out a good one. Same bandana trick so you dont get it everywhere and you’re not stuck at home all day.
p.s. the regular trims really do work! Just tell the hair dresser what your plan is and get them to cut the tiniest amount possible.