He’s the one who sat behind you and pulled your pigtails every day in middle school. The one who took you to the prom when your date backed out the night of. The one who set you up with your fiancé after college. He’s the one who knows you in and out and that’s why he’s your best friend.
So why not have the one who has always been there—the person who has gone shopping with you when you required some retail therapy, the one who knows how to put up with you and all your little idiosyncrasies—be the one who stands up for you on your wedding day?
Didn’t think it could be that way? Well ladies, it can. There’s nothing set in stone that states your maid of honour can’t be a man of honour. So go ahead and get that other special guy in your life, the one who won’t mind your obsessive behaviour over the perfect placement of every napkin ring, and let him stand right there beside you on your special day.
Shari Beck, Certified Wedding Planner and Consultant for Sandcastles (sandcastles.sharibeck.com) in Ajax, Ontario, said that although she has only known of one wedding where there was a guy as the bride’s maid of honour, she can see it becoming more commonplace. In this case, the bride’s best friend happened to be her younger brother and she wanted to not simply have him included in the wedding party, but on her side, to denote that special relationship. “Her brother wasn’t called anything particular like man of honour or honour attendant,” Beck said “he just stood beside the bride and everyone knew why.”
As far as duties go, they simply worked around the traditions. The bride’s brother wore a tux just like the groomsmen and when it came time to give the rings, the bride handed off her bouquet to her only bridesmaid.
Being a guy and the brother of the bride, he didn’t participate in some things that the typical maid of honour would. Beck comments that “he didn’t go to any of the showers, or help the bride get dressed on her wedding day.”
One of the best parts of being the bride is that you can dictate what and how you choose to execute your day. So you can outline and hand out responsibilities to whomever you like. If your man of honour wants to throw you a shower, by all means, he should do it. But for girly things like dress fittings, pedicures, manicures and hair appointments, let one of your faithful bridesmaids shoulder those responsibilities.
Charlene Weed of Dream-Maker Wedding Consultants (dreammakerwed.com) advises her clients to do whatever feels comfortable for them on their special day—be it a man of honour, best woman or the traditional wedding roles. “I think [having a man of honour] will always work if that is what the couple truly wants”.
Remember, the main role for your man of honour is to be your support throughout the entire wedding process, to listen and help out whenever you need him. So go start planning, and have fun making your special day into everything you’ve ever wanted it to be.
